Original Newsletter Post – 9/2/19
A client came to me recently to ask about her relationship. She’s been married eight years (together for twelve); they have a child together. He’s always been on the selfish side but suddenly, over the summer, he completely turned away from her and their son to concentrate on a new business. It’s a level of self-involvement he’s never shown before, not just because he’s creating something he always wanted to create, but because it’s like they aren’t even in his life. It makes her feel – no matter what she says or does to get through to him – as if he divorced himself from the family even though he still lives with them and takes advantage of her usual care. He’s even said that he’s not responsible for her or their son anymore, that he needs to think about himself now (as if he hadn’t been all along).
When I looked at where he was coming from, his energy was 100 percent about himself. He wasn’t just saying that, he really meant it. He sincerely had no concern for her or their son. It WAS all about him in such a complete way that I knew he’d never go back to trying to be in the relationship or worry about being a good dad. Something snapped in him and he stopped trying to grow in any way. It was like he decided he’d already tried too hard in his life, suddenly found it was too hard to continue any struggle and he just wasn’t going to do it anymore. So he quit, he gave up. Full stop.
I’ve noticed this pattern with many clients over our very challenging summer. The “giving up” isn’t just about relationship. It is about any challenge to achieve, whether that’s success in career or self-awareness or even studying in school. It’s giving up on anything that we came here to learn on a life-growth scale to develop us into the human beings this accelerated time demands, even though we agreed to it all before we came into this life.
Souls reincarnate for a variety of reasons. Karma is always involved, obviously. But there are also goals to achieve that build on the success of past-life knowledge – accomplishments that might not have been possible in a past of restrictions or rules that are possible now. We also come in to learn. Some of our lessons are chosen for younger souls by the angelic energy that guides us, like children in pre- and primary school who are taught the basics by teachers who know what they need to learn. If we are sufficiently soul-developed in our awareness, our lessons are self-chosen, like young adults picking classes for high school or college.
Example (continuing with the school analogy): a kid in fifth grade learns the standard scholastic lessons while expanding his understanding of social situations, i.e., getting along with others. This kid spent a good amount of fifth grade in ego, which is a way of discovering self. He inadvertently hurt his friends along the way. Then summer vacation comes and his social circle changes. He isn’t around the usual school kids. Through his natural growth, challenges and observing how people react to him, he learns to rise above fifth-grade ego and starts to find out who he is in relation to others, which makes him realize who he hurt.
When school resumes in the fall, he now has a better understanding of himself and wants to make it up to the friends who had distanced themselves from him before summer. That’s the karma involved, with summer being the time between lives. But he also has a clearer view of his studies and starts making choices about what subjects interest him, in a sixth-grade way. He starts forming ideas about goals that might be more innate than conscious. The point is, he’s at the beginning of being aware of who he is and of goals for himself, more than just the kid stuff of winning a soccer game or getting an A because he’s told to.
As this life is a very special, accelerated time that offers the ability to complete a lot of karmic work, from not just one but several lifetimes (like cleaning the slate), and it enables us to leap into the new awareness and vibration of our human evolution, souls come in with huge, ambitious agendas that can easily become overwhelming. It’s easier to see what we want to accomplish when on the other side preparing to incarnate because it’s theory. In this specific life, the theory has been harder to put into practice because the basic rules of existence started changing before we even got to the 2012 shift. So those coming in thinking life and their lessons are one thing quickly find out it’s something completely different. Same lessons, different playing field. Something young souls are sometimes not equipped to handle.
This has been more than just a brick-wall summer completing a journey of several brick-wall summers. It’s been a tipping point for many souls who have been trying to achieve their pre-life list who are suddenly and completely giving up because their trying hasn’t gotten them even a fraction of what they thought their lives would be. Because the energy of Aquarian Age growth is not slowing down but only accelerating faster, these souls who are giving up at this time will not be able to catch up. They have effectively taken themselves out of our evolution and will not only be left behind but, for a while, will drag down the energy of those still pushing forward. Eventually, those dragging others down will lose their power.
The biggest problem is not this pattern and the people who give up, it’s the people who love or work with them who are still trying and who don’t recognize what’s going on. They keep working on connecting with and understanding with no reciprocation. Sometimes that means they try harder because they don’t even consider that “giving up” on self-development is an option.
If we don’t know what’s happening to people around us, or ourselves, or why certain unusual behaviors are surfacing, it can be disconcerting. When we don’t understand what’s happening to the people we’re closest to, we invariably will look within ourselves first to see if we’re missing something (even for very judgmental people, this is true). While self-evaluation is always a good thing if not taken to extremes, there seems to be no “logical” reason for loved ones, friends, co-workers, bosses giving up. Accepting that kind of change without thinking it can turn around causes only heartache, like for my client who’s husband abandoned her even though he’s physically still there. He won’t change back to the man she knew even though she can’t quite stop trying to make it so.
With the number of young souls on the planet at this time, chances are we know at least one person who has given up for good. How we accept that and understand it on a higher level is the challenge of those who are still trying, growing and learning.
Give everyone the benefit of the doubt right now and try to avoid judging someone else’s choices. We can really only know who we are and our own lessons and growth. Judging someone for their choices, even if it’s painful in a relationship, doesn’t help. It certainly doesn’t help the person who was betrayed by being abandoned by someone who gave up.
Try to be circumspect and see beyond personal reactions to what the other person is going through. How lost or angry or alone is that person going to be for the rest of their lives if they gave up this summer? Unfortunately, the only way we can help is to accept. And that’s hard lesson when we’ve built a life or career or friendship with someone.
Hang in. It’s a Brave New World, indeed. Just probably not in the way we expected it would be. As always, I present information that isn’t all unicorns and rainbows because I believe the more we know, the more we can deal.
I offer this with love and gratitude…